Successful people have a high tolerance for discomfort. We tend to think of success as a place to which we arrive where life is a bit breezier and things flow with more ease. However, getting there is a matter of grit, and doing so takes a threshold for being uncomfortable that most people don’t naturally possess.
However, some people can condition themselves to understand that being disliked isn’t the end of the world, unexpected challenges will arise no matter what you’re doing, tolerating your feelings is better than suppressing them, and not always knowing what’s ahead can be a gift more than it is a cause for anxiety.
Here, are the uncomfortable things high-achieving people do not fear:
Discomfort.
Change does not occur without a degree of discomfort, and high-achieving people recognize this. Rather than try to constantly chase feelings that make them comfortable and happy all of the time, they evaluate which discomforts are worth enduring, and what the outcome of doing so would be. Most people don’t lack drive, they lack the willingness to be uncomfortable.
Tolerating the feelings most people suppress.
What most people fear more than anything else is their own emotions. It is not loss, failure, or tragedy that scares them, it is their potential emotional reactions that make those experiences undesirable. High-achieving people don’t let their worst fear be a feeling, they don’t let themselves be governed by the idea that they could not handle themselves if they were to experience something unpleasant.
Unexpected challenges.
High-achieving people test their boundaries, attempt what they once thought was impossible, and question everything. They rarely follow a predictable trajectory. Therefore, they learn to be okay with the unknown, and often, the unexpected. They learn to capitalize on challenges rather than be defeated by them, and maximize successes rather than let them slip by in favor of focusing on the next goal.
Being corrected.
To be committed to a life of achievement is to be committed to a life of growth, and to be committed to a life of growth, you must be willing to see when you are wrong. High-achieving people don’t let their egos run the show with this one: rather than insisting they must always be the smartest one in the room, they surround themselves with those who are wiser and more capable than them.
Being disliked, often for no logical reason.
There’s a saying that you should do what you want because you’ll be judged regardless, and to a true degree. What high-achieving people recognize is that people are going to find something to be aggravated by regardless of whether or not they pursue their dreams. The only variable is whether or not you actualize your potential – not doing so won’t shield you from being a target.
Not having a 25-year plan.
Sometimes, a degree of risk is required to live a life that exceeds your expectations. Rather than trying to abide by the status quo, high-achieving people learn to accept not knowing what the next year will bring, let alone what will be happening decades down the line. They learn to prepare accordingly, too.
Being criticized.
Whereas some people let potential criticism defeat them, high-achieving people see it not as a judgment of character, but as feedback. Rather than defending criticism, high-achieving people learn from it, and see whether there is a degree of truth within it.
Being misunderstood.
No, your great-grandparents probably aren’t going to understand your remote startup, and that’s okay. Being misunderstood is not the end of the world. What high-achieving people recognize is that while clarity and communication are essential, trying to get everyone to understand you is futile and therefore, unimportant.
Apologizing when they’re wrong.
A high-achieving person’s objective in life isn’t always to be correct or superior – that’s all ego, anyway. They are not afraid of being humbled, apologizing when an apology is due, and being able to make amends for the sake of the bigger picture.
Admitting when they don’t know.
Wisdom does not come from pretending you have it all together, it comes from being honest about what you don’t know what you wish you could be doing better, and what you do to learn from those who are more experienced than yourself. High-achieving people aren’t know-it-alls: they have a growth mindset, which requires the willingness to be wrong.
Striving for progress, not perfection.
Perfect can often become the enemy of good. Often, people exert perfectionism where they don’t feel control in essential parts of their lives. Perfectionism doesn’t make you stronger or more thorough or “driven,” it holds you back because it makes you nit-pick the small details that probably don’t matter anyway.
The opinions of anyone they wouldn’t want to switch places with.
The adage that “other people’s opinions don’t matter” is true to a degree, but what’s more true is that only some people’s opinions matter, and what’s essential is defining who those people are. High-achieving individuals value the opinions of those they love, and they take the advice of those they’d want to switch places with. It doesn’t make sense to receive guidance from anyone else.
Letting things go.
A project fell through. An old friend stopped reaching out. The business didn’t work out exactly as once envisioned. It is fundamental in life to be able to let go at times, and high-achieving people understand this. They are as willing to discard what isn’t working as they are to build what might, and striking that balance is what propels them forward.
Failing.
Failing is not the worst thing in the world. It is also not the end of your career or your life. You can only fail when you stop trying.
Living as other people won’t, so they can live as other people can’t.
Mastin Kipp says that often to be successful, you have to be willing to do what other people won’t, so you can also have what they can’t. High achieving people are not afraid of long hours of work, challenges that arise, mixed opinions, not being liked by everyone – basically, they are willing to withstand the discomfort that many aren’t, so that they can reap the benefits that any won’t.
